and i cried Góðan daginn

i had a dream a year ago that i think about all the time. it was a series of dreams actually. i can never say what they actually mean or where or how my thoughts were created. all were short but very intricate.
the first happened over a year ago. i sat in a dark room at a desk with only a single light in the room. the light sat above a wooden desk and it operated as a spotlight. i sat in a matching wooden chair, slouched over with my elbows on the desk. my head down, as id i was praying. i was waiting for someone. as i waited for was probably tenths of a second in real time but lasted forever in a dreaming state. a woman entered the doorway. my thoughts told me it was my wife as she loomed at the door. she was silhouetted by another light that was in the hall way. i was waiting for her to bring me my scriptures. as you can tell the style of the dreams i have are not fluent at all. for they happen off thoughts layered upon thoughts upon thoughts. as i reached out to grab the quad combinations of scriptures. they were not only open but my baby son was on top of them. as she passed both my son and the scriptures to me i cried. i set down the large scriptures that supported a baby on the desk. and that's all i can remember. for the first time ever i woke up in tears.
the next dream i was in some mountain range in my truck driving down a dirt road towards this mountain face. the sun had just passed mid day and was falling slowly. as i came to a turn i stopped and got out to look at the height and magnitude of the mountain. i stood at the base of the mountain and waited. as the dust settled, another light in the sky appeared behind the sun. a light that i knew exactly what it was. once again the style of my dreams happened the thought became reality. as i knew without a doubt the savior was coming. as jumped back in my truck i started to drive up the face of the mountain. i got as far as i could up the road. i jumped back out and sprinted, climbed, and crawled my way to the very tip so i could see over the edge. as i had only another few inches to go. i can't remember anymore. but once again i woke up in tears.
i had another one before that where i woke up in my room and looked out the window to find my whole family there. but i didn't see any ones face. just my mind telling me that it was my family. i could only recognize one person that was there. that person means the world to me. i hope for that wonderful feelings can become true. but still i woke up in tears
at the beginning of this month. i had a dream my grandfather was in a church building leading a sacrament meeting. once again i woke up in tears. i was lucky to bare my testimony about it though a few Sundays ago were i got real choked up.
but i had one earlier today. where i was talking to marines about doing the right things and the wrong things. i told them to forget about being "a good marine" and just be a good person. and as i finished stating these simple things, i started to get choked up. and i fell to the ground. my eyes closed slowly and the marines around me knew i was dieing and did nothing but say thanks for what i had done for them. and without pain i died. i know not what death is like but that really felt like death. i could feel life drain out. for other reasons i woke up with a smile. the time my life changed forever was the day i finished crying, for an entire week, because i was afraid to die. it was the beginning of my repentance. my change of heart. this happened 9 years ago around this time. i pray for and feel the spirit now. i love my savior Jesus Christ. i am grateful for his atoning sacrifice. i am blessed with gifts. i will try to not to ever let them lay and waste.